Men Who Go Poltergeist

Readers of my old blog will recall my five part series of posts on Ghosting. Here’s part one, if you’re a newbie.

Just to recap, “Ghost” is the new term for “voluntary celibate heterosexual male”.

Fellow manosphere blogger Single White Male has taken a long hard look at his new circumstances and decided to go…Poltergeist.

That’s a new term that Single WM coined on Twitter. While a regular ghost would deliberately avoid any sexual or romantic entanglements, a poltergeist might be down for some action if the woman came on to him and was sufficiently hot.

Your thoughts, readers?

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57 Responses to “Men Who Go Poltergeist”

  1. not recommended at all

  2. Well Im not the celibacy type s there isnt much I can add to this as far insight goes.

    • That’s the interesting thing. SWM actually learned Game, successfully applied it, got laid and now he’s saying:

      “Nahhhh….”

      • he mentioned “going to bards hoping to get laid” or something like that, so, PUA? waste of time. game to become alpha? yes

  3. I wasted 4 years as a ghost (19-24yr).

    just visited his blog, he rambles about becoming alpha = becoming the man you want to be. well, no, alpha is a social thing and an exponentiation of yourself, including your sexuality, its a full assertion. you cant go alpha in solitude

    he´ll become omega by choice, and then forget how to get out of it

    • Yes, those terms are all defined in terms of social interaction.

      When you were celibate for that time, did you just stop approaching? Did girls approach you?

      What changed?

      • I was in love with a girl who didnt want me, it was a total short circuit because I felt she was the one, and life made no sense, I became omega, had some friends, spent a lot of time drugged, writing poetry, etc

        A few girls approached me these years (now I see the sexappeal of the broken boy) but I didnt want them, I had my oneitis to worry about

      • “sex appeal of the broken boy”?

        Now that’s interesting. Maybe your preoccupation made you more attractive to those women because you were still aloof towards them?

      • yes, like that. so when I went out of that omega aloof phase, lost the aloofness, became a beta chaser (lol). a couple of girls I wanted when I was in the aloofness, as soon as I demonstrated interest, they ran away

        theres no point on going omega on purpose unless you plan to keep it that way forever

        I think thats why women have gay / religious men fetish btw. the aloofness triggers their buttons

      • “I think thats why women have gay / religious men fetish btw. the aloofness triggers their buttons”

        Now that’s some material for my next post!

    • True omeganess is indeed forced on a small group of people and there is nothing that they can do about that fact. Thanks for recognizing that there are omegas both by choice and by fate.

      For those fated to be omega, the real test is how you respond to it. Like the boy named Sue, you can let it break you or you can adopt a steely-eyed resolve to succeed in other parts of life.

      Thanks also to Joe for holding up his hands and having a “stop the madness” moment by recognizing that there is a group for which “Game” – however you choose to define it – is just a silly quest, like trying to train pigs to sing Rock Around the Clock. Roissy tries to cartoonize omegas in his quest to drive as many guys into the Game big top that he can. Joe called him on it, pointing out that the freak omegas that Roissy highlights aren’t representative of the real omegas out there.

  4. Douglos Says:

    Interesting. This is more or less the path I’ve taken, and it suits me fine. However, there are a few key differences – I still go out to bars/clubs, because that is where my work often finds me. I still meet a lot of people, including girls, and because my game is existent (it’s not tight, it’s not even good, really), I still get laid. But my attitude re: chicks, for the most part, is “meh.” I quit going out with the intention of swooping chicks about 6 months ago – I go out to have a good time with my friends, or because I have to be there for work. Don’t misunderstand, if I’m talking to a chick and I want to fuck her, I will make every effort to do so. If it fails, so be it. If I only get her number, I’ll text her the next time I’m out. If she shows up, great, I know that I’ll close about 25-35% of the time. If I don’t, I don’t invite her out anymore. This works for me. But actively pursuing pussy is a time-consuming headache. So I stopped. Much happier now, much more productive. Seems like in a lot of ways, my approach is similar to Yohami’s. I go out. I talk to people. Sometimes I get pussy, sometimes I don’t. C’est la vie.

    • Yes, I can understand guys not going out with the intention of getting laid. It takes the pressure off and puts you in a different frame.

      You’re there to meet folks and have fun. Outcome independent.

      The deal with SWM – I think – is that he’s not really “going out”.

  5. namae nanka Says:

    “Just to recap, “Ghost” is the new term for “voluntary celibate heterosexual male”.”

    You can’t renounce that which you don’t have. 🙂

    😦

    • That’s the odd thing in SWMs case. He got Game. He got laid. Now he seems to be saying that work and staying in are all he needs.

      • Bobby Says:

        i just came upon an old thread at another blog that somewhat deals with this same topic:

        http://captaincapitalism.blogspot.com/2008/10/yes-men-do-leave-market.html

      • Thanks Bobby,

        I enjoyed reading that. Its funny that alot of guys wil recommend stuff like dance classes for meeting women due to the favourable sex ratio there.

        Yes, I understand SWMs current “no sarging” rule. However, being an old cynic I’d give it a year before he joins a hot yoga class 😉

      • Bobby Says:

        I´m an OLD cynic too. I used to think that I could never get enough of women, now I think that I will eventually get too much of them.

      • Bobby Says:

        oh Joe,

        I´ve been frequenting your blog for a couple of months now and I hope to see ¨workshy cat¨ again. He always put a smile on my face.

      • Bobby, are you getting nostalgic on me?

        Tell you what, I’ll put the cat pic back up on my old blog.

        As for “getting enough women”, I’m not sure if I’d go sarging again if my LTR ended.

        Listening to the single men describe their efforts to meet women it all seems like so much fucking work.

        To all intents and purposes though, no sarging if I was single would mean one hell of a dry spell.

      • That link hit is so hard on the head. I couldn’t quite put it into words but thats EXACTLY my stance. Its about how much time you have and what you get back.

        Add into that financial issues as well (I.E. a World of warcraft account is $15 a MONTH vs most bars where the same $15 buys you one drink)

      • When I read about the woman at the dance class asking where all the guys were I thought, “why don’t they do some guy stuff for a change if they want to meet guys?”

      • Bobby Says:

        The years don´t pass in vain. I used to look at a nice set of tits and ass and kinda dwell on it. Now I just think to myself ¨well isn´t that nice¨ and move on. I am not obsesively thinking about there being a pussy between those legs. Anymore, these thoughts leave my brain about as fast as they entered. Honest to god, I am enjoying my maturity; I feel so much more relaxed. Oh, and life is becoming more and more about ME.

        Joe, that cat and I have alot in common.

      • Great comment Bobby. I’ll do a post on this.

  6. ‘yes, like that. so when I went out of that omega aloof phase, lost the aloofness, became a beta chaser (lol). a couple of girls I wanted when I was in the aloofness, as soon as I demonstrated interest, they ran away ‘

    That’s what I always did, had aloofness operating both externally and internally (smoke screen) and therefore unaware when a girl was into me while dreaming about a One ; as soon as I turned the tables she would be gone or already in the friend zone. All of this at day of course. Out at night I was always needy and boring because of its connotations with hooking up ; upshot :invisibility.

    Aloofness alone is not enough but it can be amusing if done intentionally , especially with a bit of world weary sarcasm ( my default state when I don’t care) . This seems to work even better with matching body language . You just look at people with a sly grin, throw an occasional acerbic (hopefully funny) remark and they’ll be qualifying to you. Can be hard not to be a total d*ck but, then , I have no idea what the non-beta niceness norm is anyway and fight a constant urge to apologize.

    I don’t go to clubs at all— every time I do give in to friends I swear to never go again. Lady Gaga is not my style. Could be a problem as it is such a vital part of student culture.

  7. On topic now (should do that more ) , I don’t think SWM is really going as far a voluntary celibacy. He just lacks the funds to go out (as ) much. He’ll probably run day game anyway. I interpret him asking whether he’ll lose his ‘game’ or how much he will compromise it by not actively prowling in bars. I like his blog.

    • Yeah, he writes well. He’s on my blogroll.

      I don’t blame him for ditching the bar scene. I think he’ll end up meeting women through other avenues eventually.

      • I know I’ll end up meeting womenfolk and getting laid throughout this. The inherent difference between an alpha/delta poltergeist and an omega is that the poltergeist still knows his value and that he’s worth something.

      • That’s the golden ticket. You don’t need the validation.

      • Thats my entire point. the success of being “alpha” is measured by social interaction, but its the base quality of being alpha entirely internal.

      • I wouldn’t call that “alpha”. I’d call that “happy”.

      • For many people, myself included, the two are synonymous.

      • they go together but they are not the same, the alpha gets women because he is alpha, he is not alpha for getting women

      • I totally understand that too, and thats why I’m choosing to do what it is that I’m doing. If I take 6mo to 1yr bettering myself becoming more “alpha” then women will follow, its already happening.

        I suppose this is kind of the poor modern western mans version of going to live with monks in the mountains lol.

      • Alpha, Beta and Omega are value-neutral terms drawn from Ethology.

        Alpha does not equal “happy”, “good” or even “well laid”. It just means that you dominate particular social interactions.

      • But that dominance is something I’ve always lacked, and fact that I’ve personally felt worse about because I’m a big guy. Whether its true or not I feel people look at me and expect more then they would of a guy who was 5’3″ and skinny.

        I saw this when I recently bought a new car. I got a little hatchback because it was in my price range, and literally everyones response was “I see you in a big truck or a muscle car”

        This relates to the idea of dominance because I feel the world looks at me the same way. IF you’re a big guy but meek and quiet people judge you. Being able to master that will by default make me happier. It already has.

      • They saw you in a more expensive car that would suit their sales targets.

        You stuck to your guns and went for the car that suited your needs and your budget.

        THAT’s alpha.

      • I meant friends, family, and co-workers. The salesmen can get fucked, I’m buying what I’m buying, but everyone i know personally said that I looked like I should be in a bigger, more expensive vehicle

      • Based on your appearance as a big guy?

      • Yep. The line was almost always “a big guy like you should be in a truck/caddy/muscle car

  8. A lot of hate for the Chad going on in here. Maybe hate is to strong a word.

    I’ll have to do a proper write-up on what it is that I meant by “poltergeist” it was flippantly tossed out and Joe kinda ran with it, but its never really been defined.

    As far as some of what was said above (hope I dont “ramble” to much):

    A) I never said I would not be social (granted I never said I was either)

    B) Equating the idea of being “alpha” with getting laid seems to me to be the very basic idea of pedalstalizing the pussy. You’re giving a woman and the damp hole between her legs the power to give and take your identity, whether its social or not.

    The basic idea I’m running with is an extension of MGTOW but its in regards not only to the world and women, but also to other men. The Manosphere has this idea that to be an “alpha” you have to get laid. I’m going my own way and saying that I can spend up to a year focusing on making myself a better man, physically, mentally, and psychologically and then when I’m in a place where I feel the need to jump back in I’ll be better for it.

    A lot of men, alpha, beta, omega, or other have this idea that pussy is a tool to validate yourself. I’m simply saying, why validate yourself if you already know how good you are?

    • No hate from me bro.

      I think that there are alot of Poltergeists out there. Its probably more common than going Ghost.

      I think that Yohami and Douglos’ perspectives on it are interesting. Both men in very social jobs that bring them in to contact with lots of women. No sarging required!

      • For sure, while I dont agree with a lot of what was said I like that it was said. It forces me to think about it from a different angle and in the past a lot of times I’d be in the process of defending a statement and then have an epiphany about what it was that I was talking about.

        Oh and by the way, your comment font kinda makes my eyes bleed lol

      • Don’t like the orange bro?

      • Not the color, its the grey on black and the font, maybe its just my contacts beggging to be changed.

  9. YES,

    “Equating the idea of being “alpha” with getting laid seems to me to be the very basic idea of pedalstalizing the pussy.”

    Getting woman is a byproduct. If you have it as the thing you use to measure yourself, you enter a downspiral.

    • Yohami, how much do your circumstances determine your outlook?

      So in your case, your job brings you into contact with alot of women you find desirable. You don’t have to approach. You don’t have to sarge. You just do your job. You meet people. You have fun. It happens organically.

      That has never been the case in my life. Either I did stuff specifically to meet women or I never met any women at all.

      Pre-Game that was always the case. I’m in an LTR now, but if I became single again tommorow, it would be the exact same deal.

      No sarge = no girl.

  10. Douglos Says:

    Here’s what I can tell you. My work situation puts me “out and about” 8 to 10 nights a month. Not counting my failed, 7-year “white collar job experiment,” I’ve always been in social jobs. It’s purely a byproduct that chicks dig it; I’m genuinely passionate about my current profession, and I was just as much so about my previous two non-tie-wearing gigs. While I’m not a natural extrovert and have had to try really, really hard to be a social person*, I find it really easy to engage people (dudes and chicks) when I’m cresting on the work-related high.
    *It’s also interesting to me that even though I have concrete, repeatable evidence that being social is way better than not, and I actually prefer being social to being withdrawn, it is still my default setting to be shy and I often have to talk myself into being social…

    Second tangent, I feel Chad’s pain w/r/t being big but shy. I know I’ve mentioned here and elsewhere that I’m freakishly large. People do expect you to lead, and if you don’t lead you’re thought of as weird. Surprisingly, if you just lead, people will let you. I’m still learning this shit. The biggest thing I’ve found is BODY LANGUAGE. Bad body language is amplified 10-fold on big guys. Also, fuck anyone who judges you for what you drive. I actually do drive a truck, but this is more for comfort than an outsized display of masculinity – if I could comfortably fit my frame into a Prius or something similarly fuel efficient, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

    And while I agree that “joining the monks” is a good thing (I did it myself and only wish I had this “manosphere” at the time), I’ve only ever found one feeling (music) as exhilarating as a tight young body pressed against mine. Not yeyo, not hitting the superfecta, none of that shit. I don’t know if that’s pedestalizing and I don’t even really care. I like to fuck so I try to make that happen. It wasn’t until after my own time in the fortress of solitude that I realized how much I like it for what it is (my brain making sweet cocktails of ecstasy). And the first time that happened after my time in exile was a revelation (kinda like riding a bike, you never forget that it’s cool, but you don’t always remember how fun it is, either). I just don’t define myself by it, nor do I define myself by my career, but by my impact on the world. That’s all I care about in the greater context, but if I can’t cure cancer tonight, then hell yeah I want some pussy!

    For some reason I tend to use a lot of parentheses when I’m hungover.

  11. […] JLW wrote in a comment: True omeganess is indeed forced on a small group of people and there is nothing that they can do […]

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